Author: Arthur Wentworth Eaton
Publisher: The Mutual Book Company.
Funny. Epitaphs. COLLECTED BY Arthur Wentworth Eaton. BOSTON: THE MUTUAL BOOK COMPANY. 1902. Copyright, 1885, BY H. H. CARTER & KARRICK. Let's talk of graves, of worms, and epitaphs. —Richard II, Act III, Scene ii.
Funny Epitaphs Her body dissected by fiendish man,Her bones anatomized,Her soul, we trust, has risen to God,Where few physicians rise.✠Here lies the body of Sarah Sexton,Who as a wife did never vex one.We can't say that for her at the next stone.✠Here lies the body of Ann Mann,Who lived an old woman,And died an old Mann.✠Epitaph on Lady Molesworth. Burnt to death 6 May, 1763: A peerless matron, pride of female lifeIn every state, as widow, maid, or wife;Who wedded, to threescore preserved her fame,She lived a phœnix, and expired in flame.✠A Welsh husband thus sings above the grave of his better-half: This spot is the sweetest I've seen in my life,For it raises my flowers and covers my wife.